People I'm Tired Of

If the following people would disappear from the media, I would be okay with it: Paris, Angelina and Brad, Tom and Katie (no, I won't use those stupid hybrid terms - oh yeah, that practice can go away too), Jessica and Nick (together or apart, doesn't matter), Lindsay, Brittney and Kevin, Star, Ashlee, Nicole, along with most of the "Desperate Housewives". And Paris. Again.

Confucious Say...

I am a big fan of Chinese food, and fortune cookies. I usually get a nice giggle out of the saying that comes in the cookie - sometimes it's serious (like "Many admire your social and physical appearance") and sometimes it's silly ("Big egos and big hair do not go together well"), but it usually makes SOME kind of sense. I thought. But I have now officially been proven wrong. The cookie I got tonight says, "Wow! A secret message from your teeth!"

Huh??

Are my fillings going to start picking up radio broadcasts, or transmissions from space? I guess I will just sit here in the quiet and wait for the message. I'll let you know what it is.

Fashion Faux-Pas

While surfing the 'net this evening, I came across an article on MSN.com about bad fashion choices of the past. How many did I commit?

1. Acid washed and/or ripped jeans: I think MAYBE I had a pair of acid washed jeans in high school, but if they existed, they were probably very mildly done. I was never trendy - I skated close to the edge of trendiness without falling in, because I was FAR from the popular-trend setting group. As for ripped jeans, I'd never have left the house in anything ripped on purpose. Nowadays, I do have a couple of pair of jeans that are really comfortable that just HAPPEN to have holes in one knee. But I only wear them around the house. Or maybe to the store. Nobody cares what you're wearing there.

2. Shoulder pads: guilty. I had some dresses and maybe a shirt or two that had shoulder pads. Not huge linebacker ones, but they were there. Actually I think my mom still has some shirts with shoulder pads that she wears on a regular basis. Scarily, I think they may be MY old shirts. Or my sister's.

3. Flannel: I was not grunge. I did not wear flannel shirts. When I was little I had a flannel nightgown, but I don't think this is what they're talking about. Flannel is for lumberjacks!

4. The "dancer look": this means leg warmers, headbands, tights/leggings, and ripped sweatshirts a-la Flashdance or maybe even Olivia Newton-John's Physical video (aaaahhh the horror!). I admit that I did have a pair of red-and-white striped leg warmers. They were a gift from my grandma. (She tried, the dear.) They went great with my red-and-white striped oversized oxford and red stirrup pants. Which I once wore, at age 13, on an airplane. In public.

5. Tie-dye: never had any. Made some in Girl Scouts once. I did, however, have one of those shirts that would change color when they got warm (Hydrocolor?). You could put your hand on it, or breathe through it, and the color of the fabric would change. Of course guys would always try to put their hands in the obvious place - ha ha, guys are so witty.

6. Bad hair accessories: Had some! In grade school it was the barettes woven with ribbons, and in high school I had a couple of giant bows (although not too giant - that would have been trendy) and some banana clips - but my hair is so thin that they never worked. I even had this weird scrunchy-thing that was long and had a wire in it, and you were supposed to hold it at the end of your hair, parallel with the top of your shoulders, and then wrap your hair around it, roll it up to the back of your head, and then twist your hair into neat buns or chignons. Did that ever work on me? Of course not! Don't be silly. (But did I have three different colors? Yep. Did I BEG my mom to buy them when I saw some at a kiosk in the mall? You bet!!) Keep in mind that this was when I was older, and had longer hair. When I was young I had short boy-hair, against my will, because it was easier for the parents to take care of.

But at least I can honestly say that I never had big, teased, eighties hair. :)

Make a run for the Border

As I sit here eating my very late lunch of Taco Bell (which I shouldn't be eating, because it's bad for me, and their large Pepsi could keep me in soda for an entire week), I pause to think. We have a history, Taco Bell and I. When I was a child, probably about 11 or 12 years old, spending summers in Wichita with my dad, my little sister and I would often walk to the park or the pool, and on the way home we would stop at a Taco Bell that was near the park. This is my first real recollection of eating there. I'd always order a mexican pizza, and I think she just got nachos (but I never really paid attention to what she ate unless she was eating really slowly and I was in a hurry. That happened more than it should have). As a teenager, the only thing I would eat from the entire menu was chicken soft tacos. Ever. And any menu item with sour cream was gross.

Then, during my junior year in college, I wanted to move off-campus. That meant I had to get a job to pay for rent. So I applied at Taco Bell (well, I applied lots of places but they're the only ones who called me back). I worked the night shift, which was usually 9pm-2am. I got stuck on drive-through duty, which meant that I was not only the cashier, but the dishwasher and the stocker and the sour-cream-dispenser filler.

At first I was really grossed out by the sour cream. I don't know why. I love dairy foods - and basically sour cream is just yogurt without the sweet part. Anyway, one night I was squeezing the SC out of the plastic bag it comes in (they use a contraption kind of like a giant caulking gun to put it on the food) and I was down to the last bits in the last bag, when the side of the bag popped and some of the SC got on my hand. I looked at it for a few seconds, and then got the urge to eat it. Nobody was looking. So I did. And you know? It wasn't bad. What was I grossed out about? After that, I put sour cream on just about every food item at Taco Bell. They used to have this awesome burrito-type thing that had tater tots in it. Steak and the usual taco stuff, and tater tots. It was AWESOME. I miss it. One good thing (probably the ONLY good thing) about that job was that after the store closed, we could eat the leftover food, so I could put 10 tater tots on my burrito, where everyone else only got three, and a bunch of sour cream.

Stay tuned for our next exciting chapter in the Taco Bell saga... "Cracked Hands and Drunk College Guys (or How I Got Fired)".